vague but highly disturbing-ish. there was no hantu but there was smtg else that scares me even more....confrontation...and somewat like a confession

there was running, working, random booch-looking starbucks manager sitting on a chair. can't remember if she was smoking but i thnk she was doing some paper work. telling me to not give up...and its not too late...(too late to what??) she was preeching but not too preechy. she told me that i still had time(had time to what??). he(who's "he"???) had finished work or smtg and i could still manage to catch him(again??) before he got on his secret train...i was reluctant but after what she said and how she said it..(its like she knew everything that was gong thru my head)..she mentioned he'd get help from a security guard..(one of his lobangs)..i didnt say anything or asked any questions and i was sumhow pumped..and determined.a kind of determination i never felt before.. not with anyone..or anything.. not even my MP. an so i ran.. looking.. just searching..i didnt know what but deep down i'll just know when i see it..waiting for me in the end of this dim lit tunnel...(tunnel???i knoe...)(and security guard??)..

and when i finally reached the end, there he was...the security guard.one of those kind u pluck out from movies..those stereotypical kind...old man in a crisp,not too shabby looking  many-sizes-too-big uniform..dirty green top with a darker green for his pants..and his long torchlight attached to a belt that wasnt really helping to hold his pants up at all..

and i finally said something...(funny how i wasnt out of breath)

"can i have a few more mins? please..."(what was i doing? begging to a man i've never known or met)

he(security guard) looked at me and was hesitant...(geez!) he didnt say anything but turned and walked away..indicating he actually permitted me to have some last words with this rum-runner. out from the shadows, he emerged. i couldnt recognize who it was that i was about to speak to as half his face was still in the shadows..but i could tell from just the silhouette that this man/boy was tall. undernourished and boney. tired and obviously over-worked. 

i said, "i need to tell ya smtg"

his nod was slow and weak. and its just when he stepped into the light that i thought he looked familiar. the most sincere eyes ever..that were highly familiar...exuded a familiar warmth only these particular pair of eyes can...

we made our way to a wall, sat our butts down with our backs resting on the wall and talked.

the conversation was really a confession...i warned him that i was gonna get all girly and was gonna cry......i did...

and what happened after it was what i feared most..he left without a single goodbye..and we never spoke or saw each other again..like we lived in different worlds and the was no chance in hell that our paths will ever meet.. again..

thank you random booch-looking starbucks manager...

thank you mister security guard with the loose pants...

if it were'nt for you i've probably had to suffer with 'it' till i die...

it was all weird but somehow i smiled...coz i knew that now...its ok to move on...

okayy....weirdest dream...rite???? im not too disturbed coz it did make me smile...smiling can't be bad rightt??

still a dream is just a dream...its really up to the dreamer....